Anne Glamore

Welcome to my blog. Actually, now that I’m 41, none of my friends know what a blog is, so I just tell them I write a column on the internet. So, welcome to my internet column. I’ve tried to make the font crisp and clear in case your eyes are getting as bad as mine are, but I can’t do a damn thing about your saggy neck or your spider veins. Sorry.

I started writing here in January 2005, mainly so my friend in L.A. could read about my adventures in the minivan while he lived a decidedly more glamorous life.

Here is an interview I did in January 2008.  Read it to find out more about why I blog and what I’ve learned.

I also write for Lipstick magazine and have written for Portico magazine. I’ve been published in The Mothering Heights Manual for Motherhood Volume 1, where my essay is the first one in the book, which jazzes me up.  I should warn you that I write about an episode that showcases some of my more appalling mothering skills, assuming you consider throwing underwear at your son less than stellar behavior.  (It was his underwear.)

I write about my boys, Finn (12), Drew and Porter (9) (yes, they are twins– how smart of you to notice. No, they are not identical. Yes, twins run in my family, all the time. You are correct, I sure do have my hands full! No, I’m not going to try for a girl. My husband and I put on more than we take off when we make love to prevent that particular thing from happening. And he’s had a special surgery besides. Wait– don’t you want to talk about twins anymore?)

I also write about my marriage to my husband, Bill, who is blessed with infinite patience, amazing good looks and an obsession with triathlons, which is fine by me because he wears tight outfits when he trains for them. On the down side, he keeps the house at arctic temperatures and turns into a cover-stealer at night.

I first glimpsed him at a fraternity party in the fall of 1985 but couldn’t convince him to marry me until August 1993. The man can be stubborn, but not as stubborn as me.

You’ll find a little information about my sisters and my eventful medical history, which includes surgeries for scoliosis, treatment for hepatitis C and constant screening for ovarian cancer since my mom’s sudden death from that disease in October 2005. I also post book reviews from time to time. I spend lots of time cooking and there are delicious recipes strewn about the site as well.

I am technically a lawyer although I have been on leave from my practice since my mother’s death. and I recently resumed practicing after a hiatus during which I concentrated on my writing and vacuuming.

I hope you enjoy the site. If you find a topic you are interested in, you can click the tag at the end of the post (such as “Let’s Eat” or “Scoliosis”) to read all the posts on that topic.

Feel free to leave a comment, but comments are closed after 5 days because of spammers.

I can be emailed at anneglamoreATgmailDOTcom

42 Things About Me

1. My guilty pleasure is watching music videos on VH1 in the morning while I unload the dishwasher.

2. “Little House on the Prairie” re-runs make me cry, no matter what time of the month it is.

3. I was born and raised in Alabama.

4. I have a stellar sense of smell. That’s not always an advantage in a house full of males.

5. I got hepatitis C from a blood transfusion I received during surgery for scoliosis in the 80’s.

6. When one of my boys can’t find something and asks me for help, I always sing U2″s “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For” while I drag him through the house and show him it’s exactly where I told him it would be.

7. My husband and I do not have a TV in our bedroom. I’ve never seen “Law and Order” or “CSI.” (I just started watching re-runs of CSI-Miami and have the hots for Eric Delko.)

8. I would describe myself as a strong Christian and pretty liberal compared to most people in town.

9. I began practicing law in 1992. I got married in 1993. I had my first son in 1995. His twin brothers arrived in 1998.

10. I do not wish I had a girl.

11. I am well-organized and have a to-do list for every day. I alphabetize my spices. Lots of spices start with “C.”

12. When I gave birth to my first son and they handed him to me, I didn’t recognize him and he did not feel familiar. He was not cute. He was shriveled and red. I thought, “Dang, I can’t believe I went through all of this and I’m not even sure I LIKE this kid. Now I have to take care of him for 18 years unless he runs away.”

13. I love him and his two brothers like crazy, even when they make me so mad I could spit.

14. I clearly remember the first time I saw my husband. It was the fall of 1985 and I thought he was the hottest guy I had ever seen. I still do.

15. I got an iPod for Christmas and I love it. I have 3321 songs on it right now.

16. I have a thing for Jelly Bellies. Only the fruity kind, not the weird stuff like Buttered Popcorn.  But Brach’s jelly beans are my absolute favorite.

17. My parents and my husband’s parents both got married on December 28, 1963. They both honeymooned in New Orleans. While they were there, New Orleans had a rare snowfall. Each couple visited Pat O’Brien’s, a local bar, and got a picture taken in the snowy courtyard. Odds are, they were there on the same night.

18. Public speaking does not bother me at all.

19. I am 5’4″. I have very small bosoms and very big feet.

20. I hated Eminem on principle until I listened to him. Then I decided that while he can be offensive, he is very talented.

21. I like to Jazzercise.

22. I am an apostrophe freak.

23. I always break chain letters and emails, even if I will die a violent death, miss out on a fortune, or ruin a child’s school project.

24. I have planned my funeral and marked it with a red sticky tab in my journal.

25. I have been known to exaggerate the truth for the sake of a good story.

26. Even though I have had lots of medical problems, from the outside, I look perfectly healthy.

27. If I had to pick the most beautiful piece of art in the world, I’d pick Michelangelo’s Pieta.

28. Other than that, however, I generally prefer modern art.

29. I usually assume I am smarter than most people.

30. In 5th grade, I wore glasses, braces and a back brace. This didn’t prevent the hottest guy in class from sending me a note that read: “Will you go with me? Check yes or no.” I was new to the school and didn’t know where he wanted to go. Being the cautious type, I checked “no.”

31. I am a big music fan. In contrast, my husband owned only one cassette tape when we got married, and someone had left it in the back of his car.

32. I read the local newspaper everyday and Time, US Weekly, The New Yorker and the Sunday New York Times every week.

33. I have two sisters. I don’t have any first cousins.

34. In January 2004 I went to NYC to have major spine surgery. I had developed “flatback” as a result of my first scoliosis surgery.

35. I drank my first beer in 8th grade at a Pat Benatar concert.

36. I don’t like beer.

37. I took my husband’s last name… on our tenth anniversary.

38. Most people who meet me for the first time ask, “So, do twins run in your family?” This used to drive me bonkers. Now I answer,”Yes, they do– I can’t get them to slow down!” and then I change the subject.

39. I am all for a bargain, but I believe name brand garbage bags are worth it.

40. I dress my boys in dark colors so the stains don’t show as much.

41. I hate the smell of microwave popcorn.

42. “Anne Glamore” is not my real name.

You can contact me at anneglamoreATgmailDOTcom

By the way, are you reading this in Internet Explorer? If so, you’re missing a lot. You need to download Mozilla Firefox and use that as your browser. I recently discovered that IE users can’t see my list of Best Posts and other delightful stuff, thus detracting from the overall experience of reading this blog internet column.